#I love men and masc-aligned individuals

[crabussy]

Hi what does the achillean in your profile mean ? Did your mother dip you in a river with questionable pollution control? Does your sulking throw a wrench in the war plans of the Greek alliance? Will future historians describe you and your partner as just friends? Do you hate sandals? What is it?

I’m just like achilles fr (looooves guys so much. and guy adjacent beings) except without the invulnerability. I’m pretty much vulnerable to every material on earth. for example if you hit me with a metal pipe I’d probably get hurt

[yukishirostar]

So people are talking about a post in the Zolu tag by a certain tumblr user in regards to their issues with Zolu as a ship. They shall be unnamed because i dont wish to bring attention to them and instead just want to focus on their arguments because they're not the first people to make some of these points and so this is also an opportunity for me to talk about these things (a tweet is going around on Twitter containing these screenshots with the username so you can find it there if you need to anyway).

The way this person dismisses the relationship between Zoro and Luffy as a result of needing to pair gay Zoro with someone is too laughable, they must be very fit in order to be able to do these mental gymnastics. I believe that many people who are going on about the Zolu scenes in the OPLA were already Zolu shippers who were familiar with the original story and are enjoying the moments because they were well, really good Zolu moments? And there is actually, shockingly, many good Zolu moments in the original story too which is why many people ship them. Wild, I know.

Then there's 'straight-washed Sanji'. Equally if not more of a bizarre thing to believe. I might make some people mad especially the Sanji stans out there who constantly insist on the 'repressed queer' narrative with his character, but Sanji is written pretty explicitly to be seen as a cisgender and heterosexual character. The way you say with your whole chest that Luffy is 'canonically' aroace but don't acknowledge that Sanji is 'canonically' cishet is beyond hypocritical. If you believe Sanji looking like a 'misogynistic straight man' is different from the way he is written in canon then maybe you should go back and reread/rewatch series with your eyes open this time. If you wish to headcanon him with the frankly offensive repressed bisexual/transgender cliché then go ahead, but that is clearly not the intention Oda has with his character.

There's also the fact that aroace people can uh. Be in relationships. Get married. Have children. Did it occur to you that many people who ship Zolu ship them as an ace couple or-

First thing I want to say here, as a trans man who is 'mlm', can other dudes stop with this idea that women or fem-aligned individuals enjoying homosexual relationships between two men is inherently fetishising or that as a masc-aligned individual your enjoyment of a ship is morally superior in some way. Stop pulling out your 'mlm/ transmasc / cis gay' card in order to justify why your ship is superior. Its cringe af.

But if we are to insist that 'cishet female gaze fetishising mlm' is going on then ironically Zosan fits that the better than any ship in the fandom. It being by far the most popular mlm ship means there is likely a higher proportion of people who identify as cishet women who ship it. Its also the classic 'two men who dislike/hate eachother and have a toxic relationship but hot sexual tension' slash/yaoi stereotype. Majority of Zosan I've come across is depicting Zoro as the masculine male man in the relationship while Sanji the effeminate twink that Sanji stans project themselves onto and they go crazy for the bickering that is apparently reminiscent to them of a toxic heterosexual marriage. Meanwhile every Zolu/Luzo shipper I've interacted with has been some flavour of queer and Zolu is closest to the 'falling in love with your same sex bestie' narrative that the majority if not every non-heterosexual person has experienced at least once in their lifetime. This is just my personal view of course, but I think noting a difference in perspective on this topic is interesting and reveals that at the end of the day this is totally subjective and based purely on anecdotes.

Also it's just a very weird point here that apparently OP has 'plenty of varied queer rep' (it actually doesn't have that many canonical queer characters in relation to its cast size but anyway) and other media doesn't so shipping aroace characters in gay relationships is valid in those but not in One Piece … HUH???? So you're saying if One Piece had 'less' queer rep, then Zolu would be fine to ship? Idek my brain hurts.

"I have black friends so I'll speak for the black community and get offended for them" (btw this person then proceeded to block aroace people who had issues with their depiction of aroace people).

Also if we're talking canonical depictions, the only thing Zoro has been canonically depicted as is also aroace, equally if not moreso than Luffy. So by your own rules, you can't ship a cishet (sanji) with an aroace (zoro), therefore Zosan is now invalid. Stop erasing Zoro's aroace identity bigot.

'Categorically wrong' makes me laugh. I don't ship Zoro and Nami but like, people can ship what they want to??

'The general public is aware enough of gay people and how to spot them these days' uh... firstly this sounds very homophobic. Secondly the general public (cishet ppl) are famously bad at recognising queerness even when its in flashing lights before them. Thirdly you make it sound like Zoro was going around on roller skates and booty shorts listening to YMCA and Madonna in the show. I do agree he was gay-coded but it was mostly because he had sexual tension with every man he interacted with, not for the strange reasons you pointed out...

Its kinda the elephant in the room too but like. These are just headcanons. You can have multiple headcanons and interpretations of a character's sexuality. I can see Zoro as aroace virgin one day and a gay h*e the next. I'm actually allowed, legally, to do that.

The way they think shipping Zolu is harmful to aroace representation when BOTH characters are closest to being canonically aroace than anything yet ship Zosan, label being anti-Zolu as some kind of pro-ace activism, and then proceeded to block aroace people for criticising their incorrect depiction of what being aroace is...

This was a lot of words to say that you don't like a ship. Just say you don't like it, and it gets in the way of the ship you like, instead of writing a virtue signalling essay to justify your reasoning. Please.

They had some more to say on future posts I'll just pick my favourite bits

They really have this narrative that Zolu is only popular because of OPLA and can't fathom that its just a popular ship in general and always has been huh. And they couldn't make it more obvious that they're totally salty about it ranking in the top 100 most popular tumblr ships, lmao.

Your classic case of 'self-identifying ally who speaks over the people they are supposed allies of'. Its a general rule that you feel the need to declare yourself an ally you're probably not an ally, actual allies know they need to just shut up and do the work. Saying 'this character's aroace' and 'I have aroace friends' actually isn't what allyship is, thats just accepting that ace people exist which is like... the baseline.

Calling a wholesome loving ship like Zolu an icky ship is a severe consequence of online brain (this person is 26 years old btw)

[a-d-nox]

are there centers in human design that can be considered masculine/feminine? (Like how Sun and Mars give masc energy and how Moon and Venus give feminine energy)

or is there even more androgynous centers too (I'd think Mercury is pretty similar to that energy)?

human design: how certain gates and channels fit gender/genderless stereotypes

feminine

gate 2: this is what i think of when people say "women's intuition" - it's all about sensing with this gate. they feel things out instead of relying on guidance and rules.

gate 13: a receptive gate - in the olden days women were the gatherers and men were the hunters. now a days this gate is synonymous with receiving messages from others - often people feel comfortable with the active gate person to the point where things are overshared to them... its the placement of an empath - therapists commonly have this placement. a lot societal expectations for feminine individuals center on the themes of this gate: receptivity, comforting, empathy, etc.

gate 15: the love for others and unassuming energy of this gate in my opinion aligns with femininity. its like a mother nature energy there is love/support/respect for all of the world's creatures.

channel 2->14: this feels like the magic of the feminine. there is one place where all things end and begin as people say and that is the womb. this is a gate that reminds me of such power - the creation of life is unlike anything else.

channel 37->40: these are trustworthy people - their word is their bond. you can trust them completely without fear. they use shared values, desires, and emotions to create stronger connections with others. i feel like these people also have the tendency to be very touchy feely.

masculine

gate 10: no fears just vibes. this placement is one of those that is hard to place - its just so indifferent and cocky to me? no one is this prideful and sure of themselves as a masculine energy?

gate 21: not to get all cave person again like but this is a hunter not a gatherer. they bring home the bacon, are protective, and are a primary decision maker.

gate 34: this just a gate of raw power and independence - which screams masculinity to me.

channel 21->45: "this is a mans world". this is a placement fit for a king. this people are authoritative, leaders, and natural managers of people/things around them.

channel 34->20: business man vibes. this is a force to be reckoned with - they are unstoppable and ooze capability. its sort of cocky to me again...

androgyny

gate 29: this gate knows how to adapt it doesn't lean any which way. it can be passive or assertive depending on the situation.

gate 44: again survival for survival sake type of vibes - they can be both the hunter and the gatherer with this gate active.

channel 1->8: tabula rasa vibes - powerful in a mysterious way. its not clear or concise. they know who they are and that is all that matters to them.

channel 9->52: this is a passive (feminine) and an active (masculine) gate meshing together. they have the ability to be both productive yet patient and introspective.

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[mtreebeardiles]

Hmm so that post about normalizing male love did indeed come from someone who’s beliefs come from a place I don’t really agree with, and in the interest of that, I wanted to quote someone else who sees the problem from a lens more aligned with progressive thinking: bell hooks.

From The Will to Change

We construct a culture where male pain can have no voice, where male hurt cannot be named or healed. It is not just men who do not take their pain seriously. Most women do not want to deal with male pain if it interferes with the satisfaction of female desire. When feminist movement led to men’s liberation, including male exploration of “feelings,” some women mocked male emotional expression with the same disgust and contempt as sexist men. Despite all the expressed feminist longing for men of feeling, when men worked to get in touch with feelings, no one really wanted to reward them. In feminist circles men who wanted to change were often labeled narcissistic or needy. Individual men who expressed feelings were often seen as attention seekers, patriarchal manipulators trying to steal the stage with their drama.

Some highlights as to how patriarchy is also negative towards men/masculinity:

The unhappiness of men in relationships, the grief men feel about the failure of love, often goes unnoticed in our society precisely because the patriarchal culture really does not care if men are unhappy.

Patriarchal mores teach a form of emotional stoicism to men that says they are more manly if they do not feel, but if by chance they should feel and the feelings hurt, the manly response is to stuff them down, to forget about them, to hope they go away.

I was gonna slap on the usual disclaimer about male privilege and how patriarchy affects men/masculinity and women/femininity differently but I don’t think the usual disclaimers really work anymore because adherence to a binary and refusing to acknowledge the intersectional realities of privilege are kinda inadequate in reality, aren’t they? It’s the same shit that takes socialization and conflates it with biological essentialism when reality is not everyone is socialized in the same way — but cultural, and specifically patriarchal, systems have a way of punishing/discouraging certain behaviors based on perceived traits both in terms of external AND internal expectations. A young trans masc, for instance, is not ‘socialized’ female prior to coming out/transitioning to whatever degree in the same sense a cis girl is — the external factors still influence expectations, but the two are engaging with it differently as their internal perceptions alter perspectives, if that makes sense. To put it another way, my engagement with femininity from a feminine lens always felt very wrong — engaging with it again now that I am more comfortable and have embraced my masculinity feels so much better.

But to ground this again in bell hooks, consider:

We need to highlight the role women play in perpetuating and sustaining patriarchal culture so that we will recognize patriarchy as a system women and men support equally, even if men receive more rewards from that system. Dismantling and changing patriarchal culture is work that men and women must do together.

You can’t change a system by adhering to ANY of its methodologies. Denying men emotional growth, expression, and the ability to communicate their feelings in healthy ways IS the same method used by the patriarchy — yes, even if it is a woman doing it.

[clown-prince-of-gay]

Happy Pride everyone~~

I drew me and my lovely boyfriend @king-of-vertigo, (I love you honeybee~), We are being gay and transing all your children. Watch out or you're next.

Anyways. Happy Pride to those who celebrate. (And especially happy pride slay queen girlypop month to those who don't) Under the cut I'll have each flag and an explanation of what it means to me~

Likes and reblogs appreciated!! Do not repost!

I would like to preface this with: I am not an expert in all of these identities (despite being a part of them) and my connection to them is hugely shaped by my own experience and interpretation of each label. My only hope with all this is to hopefully make someone feel less alone, (because my god i spent a long time finding some of these labels-)

Aceflux

Aceflux us defined as a person with a fluctuating feeing of sexual attraction to others, I sort of think of it like a dial being turned up and down based on the moment. (there are also romantic and aroace versions of the label I beleive, along with another variation of the flag with a purple/red gradient striping.)

In my own experience that results in differing kinds of days, some where I feel really strong attraction, others where I feel little to none. Sometimes it changes day to day, sometimes its the same for weeks, or it changes throughout the day based on context.

This label was one that took me. An entirely too long time to find. and this is one that feels. right. because I had very flexible and changing feelings and attraction, I knew I could place myself somewhere on the ace spectrum, but not exactly where because it wasn't consistent at all (wowee i wonder why that is because its not like thats the whole thing lmao) and I ended up cycling through so many aspec labels. This is one that I can feel comfortable in, and I'm hoping others resonate with it as well.

Queer

Queer is an umbrella term and very ambiguous identity that can essentially encompass anyone that identifies with it.

So- my sexuality is. incredibly nuanced and complicated when it comes to describing who I find myself romantically, aesthetically, or platonically attracted to (I know there are so many other ways to be attracted to someone, those are just the simplest for me to explain). For example: I can (when allowed by my silly demiromantic ass) be romantically attracted to men and masc (or even non aligned) presenting and identifying people, and I in fact, have a lovely boyfriend whom I love a lot! And as for femme aligned people its more interesting because I don't feel particularly romantically about them, but I can experience aesthetic, or platonic forms of attraction, and Queer is simply a label that I connect with that has the space to encompass all of that.

Demiromantic

Demiromantic is a label that essentially encompasses the idea that an individual doesn't feel romantic attraction to another unless they have an emotional or platonic bond with that person. (there is also an ace and an aroace version, which I think is super neat)

Demiromantic is a label that I personally connect with, be that because I'm naturally incredibly slow to make connections, or maybe connected to the fact that I'm very neurodivergent, (although thats a post for another day-) and feeling comfortable being and feeling romantic about someone is already incredibly rare, and I feel like I need a connection to someone personally until I can feel romantically (I say that like I control when I feel romantic. Its kinda. I dunno I can't control it. this label is just one I felt encompassed it. which is the point.)

Transgender

Transgender is an umbrella term in which someone doesnt connect or identify with the assigned gender given at birth. (I'm very sure I have made it no secret that I am transmasc. We love the transes here)

However. no matter how many labels I find to express and explain my gender being 'masculine' (with several different question marks. I'm a boy in the same way orange soda is the same as a regular orange. same sorta spirit. completely different executions.) above all. I am still trans. and I will always be trans. that's who I am <33

My gender is. an interesting topic. In the way that I have not yet found a label to describe it other than being transmasc. which I know as different to being a trans 'man' in the fact that I didnt transition to be a 'man', not binarily being a man. I bounce between being androgynous and being masculine, but in a way where labels like demigendered/demiboy or boyflux (other labels I've considered) don't seem to fit. because it is in a way where some days I feel more or less masculine to completely genderless. (If anyone can think of a label that fits that- I would love to hear it. I haven't even gotten into My pronoun search. maybe a seperate post on that later.)

[twyla19]

Happy Pride Month!

It's June 9th, and we are just iver a week into this amazing month.

Some reminders:

Trans men are men

Trans women are women

Non binary individuals are non binary

This also doesn't define them if these individuals look, dress, or have interested that don't "align" with their gender.

Men can wear skirts and like dolls

Women can be mechanics and like trucks

Non binary people don't owe people androgyny nor being masc or femme to "fit in" a box.

There is no pride in genocide, yes i am bringing this up cause theres a bunch of pink washing and general rainbow washing that makes certain countries look "better" to prove that the genocide they are commiting is "okay"

GENOCIDE IS NOT OKAY, DEATH AND MURDER ARE NOT OKAY!

No matter who you are, in Gaza, Sudan, Congo, and the many other places that are currently suffering from genocide, the oppressor wants them all dead.

They do deserve life and live freely. They deserve love, compassion, and to be able live on THEIR land without worries of being killed for it.

Im not gonna be a hypocrite either. This goes for Indigenous people, indigenous Hawai'ians, and all the other territories the US has power over. They deserve to be independent, thriving nations without the worry of a money hungry billionaire country stepping in the way.

Hell billionaires shouldn't even exist. Housing is a necessity. Food is a human right, and so is water. Education should be free. Healthcare is a human right and deserves to be given to everyone that needs it.

The US needs to bud out of other peoples business and focus on what is going on here. But nope, they dont care cause of capitalism. Where workers basically work until they die or die while working. And if you fit outside their standards (like myself being disabled), they dont want you to live anyways nor be happy.

Pride events need to be accessible FOR ALL, meaning spaces need to be wheelchair and accommodative to disabled queer people.

Intersectionality needs to be a part of everything we do and especially for activism.

So for some hopeful stuff.

Some states have been working on becoming state sancuaries for queer and trans people.

There have been many resources that i have reblogged about Gaza and helping palestinians get funds to get out of Gasa and to safety. If not, OperationOliveBranch on Instagram and Tiktok also have a great linktree resource of how to help.

Finally, love will win and conquer over everything else. This post may seem hopeless or doom posting, but that is the reality. It's not even half of what my brain goes through a cycle of hope and despair. I am hopeful things will change and get better, that we all will stop worrying about our differences and fight against the people who actually want us to fight while they play astronauts and water divers.

If you made it this far into this post, share an emoji in the comments or reblog this.

[genderstarbucks]

Hello, I’m gonna call myself uh..(checks emojis indecisively staring at them) 🥥 I like coconuts. Coconut anon.

Listen, I’m not a bi lesbian, nor Turiboy/girl/nonbinary nor any other conflicting labels that have somehow found their way into honestly meaningless controversy. Nor do I expect to really understand them, (I think it’s Bisexual Homoromantic right?) but everyone has a different way of experiencing gender and sexuality and if that’s what makes you, you then that’s wonderful man.

I’m more confused how they even ended up controversial in the first place.

We're controversial because our identities are "contradicting" because according to exclus, you can't bisexual and a lesbian at the same or be a boy and a lesbian because lesbian is non men loving non men (it's not)

If you'd like to understand, here's some common examples as to why people like me identify this way! Obviously these aren't all the experiences people experience, these are just the most common reasons why we identify like this

Turigirls: being a trans woman but still feel connected to the gay label, gay bigender individuals, gay genderfluid individuals, fem gay individuals who use girl = fem, femme gays, she/her gays, transfem gays, being cusper between a trans woman and a cis femme gay, being cross-aligned, and many more!

Lesboys: being a trans man but still feel connected to the lesbian label, lesbian bigender individuals, lesbian bigender individuals, masc gay individuals who use boy = masc, butch lesbians, he/him lesbians, transmasc lesbians, being cusper between a trans man and a cis butch lesbian, being cross-aligned, and many more!

Mspec lesbians/gays/straights: using the split attraction model (such as being homoromantic bisexual like you said), being abrosexual and being fluid between those identities, feeling like ones identity is in between said identities (such as being bisexual and gay because they're attracted to any genders besides feminine ones and women, so their identity technically counts as mspec but it can also be considered gay), being duosexual (being both at once) and many more!

Straight gays/lesbians: using the split attraction model, being abrosexual and being fluid between those identities, being duosexual, being bigender so their attraction is both gay/lesbian and straight, being genderfluid so their attraction is both gay/lesbian and straight, feeling like ones gay/lesbian attraction is straight and vice versa, being a man/woman with straight attraction to women/men and gay attraction to men/women but not necessarily being mspec, and many more!

Either way, thanks for being respectful even when you don't understand these types of identities!

[sysinfodump]

We have a very weird stance on LGBTQ+ identities. Also this somehow has a paragraph about our perfect boyfriend at the bottom so

We collectively identify as systemfluid (collective gender changes depending on front) because that’s the most accurate descriptor we can find. The majority of us are men or masc-aligned, but we refer to the body using it/its, and collectively use masc and andro terms. (boyfriend/partner, guys/people, etc.)

When trying to figure out our individual genders it’s like [A] can’t tell if it’s [A] or if [B] is influencing it. It’s the same for sexuality but it could also be the [A] isn’t sure if they’re attracted to masc people in general or just our boyfriend, or if they even feel attraction, because [A] likes being with our boyfriend but isn’t sure if they actually love him like most of us.

We have a weird experience with relationships in general, oftentimes we’re not sure if it’s love, fascination, or just happiness that’s making us kick our feet and roll around in bed talking to him.

Speaking of him, our boyfriend is incredibly sweet because not only is he a total keeper and an adorable little nard but he ALSO periodically checks our sp for new alters or a change in front AND uses both /r and /p as to not exclude those of us that are aroace or lesbians! He’s actually so perfect, I wish everyone had their own personalized version of him but ours would obviously be the best because he’s the original ><

-🗝️🎪 (may we claim this if its not taken? if so, then 🗝️🎭 also works!)

Awww this is so cute! I'm happy you found a boyfriend so sweet and understanding as him

I get that having a CDD really affects on how your identity presents, especially in the queer aspect, it can be very strange and come to a point were you can't really describe the full experience with just a few words but that doesn't make it any less valid

I'm happy that you found someone who can respect that and makes you happy, I wish you all the best to your system, you and your boyfriend!

[fictionkinfessions]

it's kinda difficult going from being vincian to aroace because I used to have a boyfriend, I did genuinely love him romantically but I don't think if I met him this time I could love him that way again.

I want to be able to meet other riordanverse beings but I'm worried that they'll expect me to be the same way I used to be, when I'm not, I used to have a QPR with Reyna, I was dating Will and I used crutches, now I'm vinciqueerplatonic (queerplatonic attraction felt towards men/boys, masc aligned individuals and nb individuals), I'm aroace and I don't even know if I need mobility aids anymore (I'm definitely physically disabled due to hypermobility, chronic pains and chronic nausea though, which I used to have as Nico, well, I still am Nico just different now.) anyone from that universe who knew the version of me that I was will notice the differences whether they want what we used to have again or not.

idk I'm still figuring this out..

-a Nico Di Angelo fictionkin who's kinda sad about change, also can I be 🦋🐌💀 anon? I'm also the host of a system so can we also claim 🌟🌒 as our general signoff if it's available? Only two of us want to interact with this blog and the other headmate doesn't front much but we still want to be able to identify eachother's asks because it makes things easier, I probably won't use it as much though since I am our most frequent fronter.

If you mean signature consisting of emojis and or text that has no hashtag symbol: I do not and will never keep track of them. You are free to scroll back a few pages and check for yourself. If a signature is in use by someone else, I'm sure they will come forward to clarify.

If you mean custom tag consisting of emojis and or text with a hashtag symbol: I do not and will never keep track of used custom tags. You are free to search for yourself. Keep in mind emojis may not show results even though they are used if you are on mobile. This is the fault of tumblr's search index. I cannot fix this for you. You do not need my permission to search for used custom tags. You should not ask me to do this when you are capable of doing this yourself.

There is an entire page of information on custom tags and the difference of custom tags and signatures. You will find them here as a blog page https://fictionkinfessions.tumblr.com/customtags and here as a blog post. https://fictionkinfessions.tumblr.com/tagged/custom%20tags%20page

All blog pages can be found under the tag 'blogpages' including the rules page.

. https://fictionkinfessions.tumblr.com/tagged/blogpages

the custom tags page https://fictionkinfessions.tumblr.com/customtags

. #4 Can I reserve custom tags?

No, sorry, we don’t allow reserving, hoarding, or earmarking custom tags. If you want to use a custom tag, please check if it’s available, and please go ahead and use it in a confession.

Replace custom tag for signature unless you mean custom tag but for some reason forgot the hashtag symbol.

[mejomonster]

Any other trans friends i could use ur personal knowledge input. Ill also look this up though so don't worry im assuming like the definution of bi theres gonna be varied overlapping definitions

(So pre warning these first big paragraphs are preamble on what ive heard as far as more recent definitions, it can ALL be skipped down to my question. Basic summary is: DEI taught about gender identity, gender presentatuon, and sexuality spectrums and how they dont necesarily match the way stereotypes would expect as each Individual experiences those 3 spectrums their own way). Okay so the last time i got proper formal definitions taught was a Diversity Equity Inclusion training. Which was eons ahead of what my schools ever taught but it was still not all encompassing. Training included mentioning: sexuality is a spectrum, pansexuality and bisexuality are being able to feel attraction to multiple genders, heterosexuality and homosexuality are attraction to one gender, asexuality as an umbrella term for people who experience no sexual attraction or various levels different than the other sexualities, queer is an all encompassing umbrella term that lgbt people may use but a person outside the community should not use to refer to a person unless specifically asked to (and its also a label various academic texts use to describe lgbt elements discussed). Also the romantic attaction spectrum was mentioned, as like the sexuality spectrum but not necessarily matching it for any particular person (as in one can be bisexual and demiromantic, homoromantic and asexual, not just say bisexual and alloromantic). Training mentioned gender identity is a spectrum (and nonbinary is an umbrella term, as is genderqueer, for various identites that dont identify as men and women, agender includes people who do not identify with genders - basically gender is diverse as human experience, as with all other points).

Gender Presentation is a spectrum, and they do NOT have to match up (such as a butch woman, a feminine woman who goes by he him, a feminine man who uses he him, a masculine looking man who wears dresses basically in terms of clothing hair pronouns social activities any person can embody any kind of traits along the masculine to feminine spectrum - and may also align them differently as in a country woman may see "girls dont cry!" As a feminine associated expectation while an oldest son might also see "boys dont cry" as a masculine associate expectation to his own life experience, i could go on forever but basically clothes/hobbies do NOT equal gender identity. Pronouns do NOT necessarily equal gender identity). So like. The trainer my nonbinary coworker used examples like them using the pronouns they/he/she and prefering to dress more masculine but still using they/she/he and sometimes really enjoying dresses and still using they/she/he, of how some butch women may prefer he him or she her and theyre women If they simply identify as women, women who wear pants and no makeup and go by she her, men who love makeup and go by he him, some of my coworkers realized that day they prefered they/them (presentation) even if their gender identity was man or woman. Basically the point is Presentation is diverse. There is no one to one perfect list of traits to define what each gender identity "must be." Youre your gender identity because you are that gender, it feels right for you. You express and present yourself how you want, and that doesnt necessarily align with masc for men or fem for woman or androgynous for nonbinary, those are just the basic things strangers might assume. And the person labelling themselves understands more than you. (So in this case like gender nonconforming presentation would be a man who wears glam makeup or woman who never wears makeup, a nonbinary person who leans heavily into clothes that arent associated with androgyny, im not explaining well but i hope u are kinda getting my point).

Anyway my point was Gender Identity (im a guy a girl im nonbinary im agender), is not the same as Gender Presentation (the spectrum of human traits society vaguely interprets as masculine feminine and androgynous and where each individual lands in terms of presenting themselves such as clothing, hair, hobbies, social traits, etc)

Now my question Im really confused about:

Im nonbinary im bi. Im also a few other things and sometimes just saying im queer makes my life easier.

Im a bit confused about what transmasc and transfem as labels mean. Because i can only interpret the words on my current knowledge by guessing the masc and fem in the words Either relate to Gender Identity, or Gender Presentation. The words obviously are for trans people. But i have no idea at all where a trans butch woman falls in this scale, or a trans man who dresses very femininely, or nonbinary people like me who embrace masculinity and femininity a lot (and hey its okay if maybe nonbinary ppl like me just dont fit inside these terms).

Is the masc and fem in those labels referring to "man-spectrum" gender IDENTITY and "woman-spectrum" gender IDENTITY?

So this would mean maybe transfem: trans woman, any nonbinary or genderqueer person who relates slightly more to feeling the gender of woman, this would include trans butch women, and nonbinary people with beards etc who present visually very masculine but identify slightly more with women

Transmasc: trans man, nonbinary or genderqueer person who relates more slightly to the gender of man. This would include feminine trans men who wear dresses and makeup, include nonbinary people who Present visually very feminine but identify slightly more with men

OR is the masc and fem relating to gender PRESENTATION? Which would mean the terms include any trans person of any gender identity, who mainly presents masculine or mainly presents feminine

Transfem: trans women who are feminine presenting, trans men who are feminine presenting, nonbinary people who are more feminine presenting visually (feminine presenting as in clothing, hairstyles, hobbies etc that generally are interpreted by others as feminine)

Transmasc: trans men who are masculine presenting, trans women who are masculine presenting, nonbinary people who are more masculine presenting visually

Can you see where im getting confused? Depending on if masc and fem are refering to gender identity Or presentation, a trans butch woman is transmasc or transfem. So would a trans butch woman be transfem for transitioning to a woman physically, or transmasc for physically presenting masculinely and being trans. Would a nonbinary person who medically transitioned taking testosterone who wears dresses and makeup be a transmasc (for being a trans man) or transfem for being a trans person who presents feminine fashion choices. And im assuming the labels dont include nonbinary people that dont really lean one way or the other but like... if a nonbinary person is included in the terms is it based on the gender they more closely identify to on the spectrum (which for some of us is None, is multiple, is gender identities not within man or woman), or in the terms it is based on their visual presentation (which again! Nonbinary people can be androgynous, can embrace masculinity and femininity, can embrace one more than the other, can present our selves in ways meant to exclude those categorizations).

Tldr: is the masc and fem in transfem and transmasc refering to gender Identity or gender Presentation?

(And i suppose part of my confusion is like. Unfortunately in my social media experience over the last 10 years i saw the rise of "are you afab or amab" which screamed unpleasant unnecessary attempts to drag us back to "but what were u before transition" bullshit, and then recently in the "girl dinner" "boys are academia girls are shopping" and the lgbt community similar memes "lesbians are cottagecore gay men are clubbing" "transmen are so bob the builder transwomen are so my little pony" its giving Gender Expectations. Its giving: old school traditional limiting gender requirements on people if they want to conform to traditionalist norms. Its giving girls are stupid and soft abd emotional and boys are strong and smart and analytical - which isnt true by the way, you can be any traits regardless of gender identity you are. Ive been seeing a lot of "transmascs are army clips" "transfem are delicate jewelry" memes lately and its just like... aside from the fact im already sick of reinforcing gender stereotypes in a broad way. The memes are also confusing me because im like okay so is this implying trans men MUST be masculine, and transwomen MUST be feminine? Cause if its about gender identity, then that sure feels like thats the implication. I dont necessarily think the actual labels imply that necessarily, but i do think the memes of this nature just like ALL the widespread gender-stereotype memes imply some shit about expectations i do not like seeing reinforced as much as it goes around)

[indigoelfinspirit]

I posted 524 times in 2022

318 posts created (61%)

206 posts reblogged (39%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@samssims

@wastelandwhisperer

@indigoelfinspirit

@rebouks

@mathemagicsims

I tagged 400 of my posts in 2022

Only 24% of my posts had no tags

#hadrianbc - 105 posts

#berry sims - 104 posts

#hadrian’s perfect fit - 91 posts

#hadrian cerestes - 89 posts

#ts4 - 75 posts

#itsa - 73 posts

#bpr - 73 posts

#berry pastel rainbowcy - 72 posts

#if the stars align - 71 posts

#sims 4 - 69 posts

Longest Tag: 131 characters

#it’s almost hilarious if they hadn't paid $2000 for a rental and wedding hall in tartosa only to be stuck in their nonexistent yard

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

See the full post

34 notes - Posted August 7, 2022

#4

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35 notes - Posted July 7, 2022

#3

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35 notes - Posted October 23, 2022

#2

See the full post

36 notes - Posted August 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Hadrian’s Perfect Fit

Hadrian is ready to look for love again after having his heart broken on Ada's Bachelorette. The 33 year old stylist admits that the Bachelorette was not his finest moment, and has come to accept that he wasn’t being true to himself. Our newest bachelor is bringing a twist to the traditional challenge - Hadrian is bi with a preference for masc partners. So there may be fewer glamorous dresses this season, but Hadrian assures us there will be plenty of romance. The Bachelor and contestants will spend quite a bit of time traveling to exotic locales as Hadrian is looking for someone to go on adventures with.

The show is currently searching for contestants, and will be accepting applications until June 22nd. 

More information below the cut & link to Hadrian’s full biography

Hadrian Cerestes

Age 33

Bi (leans pan but generally prefers masc or nonbinary partners)

Hometown: Henford on Bagley 

Current Residence: Hadrian splits his time between Del Sol Valley and San Myshuno

Career: Celebrity Stylist

Interests: Fashion, travel, spending time with his niece and nephew, good food, and spa days

Fun Facts: He’s retained his posh Britsim accent. Spends the first weekend of every winter break at Mouseland with his niblings for Winterfest, and has a secret collection of Mouse wear explicitly for those trips.

Hadrian’s Full Biography can be found here

If you want to see what happened in Ada’s BC go here

                                                            ...

Submission Guidelines

YA preferred (for the purpose of this BC that means under 40), Adult submissions will be considered and entered at Hadrian’s discretion

Gay/Bi/Pan/Queer men, nonbinary individuals, and trans masc sims accepted. 

Please fill free to give them careers and skills (and cheat them a reasonable amount - don’t max everything). No romantic or unfairly traits please.

Your sim will need an entry introduction and a backstory/profile that gives me more information to go off of. Please feel free to dm me more information if you want there to be surprises or if you just think of something. Sims eliminated from other bcs will be allowed as long as their bio addresses what happened.

This BC is a bit of storytelling and gameplay so decisions will not be made purely from results. Eliminated sims may be used as side characters in potential post bc story (but if you want them back feel free to let me know). Also please let me know on the form if your sim is okay with getting pregnant or getting others pregnant (or neither or both) since mpreg is an option in my saves. I will do my best to properly interpret your sim’s personality, but this is going to be my best guess based on what you give me.

Please provide at least 1 outfit for each category preferably 2-3 for everyday and formal

Maxis Match CC allowed within limits (hair below 7mbs, skin details, tattoos welcome) CC can if be used for the first everyday outfit, but not the rest unless it is repeated (ex. Cc glasses or jewelry from the first outfit can be added to the other outfits since it’s not adding additional files). I have default replacement eyes and about a half dozen Sorbet Remix, Academia, and Jewl eyes so I will be using ones I already have, but I will try to get close if you specify a color. No Alpha cc, sliders, or custom traits (they will show up blank and I will fill them in based on their story).

No occults, vanilla sims preferred.

Pack info: All current EPs and GPS, no kits, and some SPs (Tiny, backyard, kitchen, tots, kids, movie, knitting, Moschino, laundry, and spooky)

All submitted sims will be accepted at my discretion up to 20 sims.

                                                           ...

Send your gays here (google form does not collect emails)

Also post and tag me and use hashtag #HadrianBC or #Hadrian’s Perfect Fit I will reblog as I see the notifications. If I haven’t reblogged it within a couple days DM me the link. 

54 notes - Posted June 11, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[unladielike]

PROS AND CONS OF DATING VIVIAN.

the pros.

She’s a very cute, glasses wearing girl. Need I say more?

You will likely end up being her special interest... aka she will have a page in her notebook dedicated to you, with all your likes and dislikes written in it. Stuff like blood type, birthday, hobbies, kinks, and turn offs would also be included as well, but regardless, you can expect to be gushed about.

There will never be a dull moment with her, so you don’t have to ever worry about being bored.

She will bring you flowers, regardless of your gender.

Vivian will take care of you if you get sick. Seriously, this girl won’t take no for an answer and will see to it that your health improves!

It’s very likely you will be the only person she truly loves. Like, she may be sexually attracted to other people, but she’s not the type to really fall for others, so romantically speaking, she will only ever have eyes for you.

Vivian actually likes physical contact and being touched, so unlike most touch-averse autistic individuals, she adores PDA, to the point where she won’t be uncomfortable if you shower her with affection.

She’s a very good girl. For example, Vivian isn’t very motivated to cook for only herself, but if she’s cooking for two, you can expect consistent home-cooked meals. She will also actually listen to you and heed what you have to say, so if you tell her you’re lactose intolerant? Expect anything she bakes/cooks to have no milk in it.

Vivian is an extrovert, so if you’re not much a talker, she can do most of the talking for you.

She’s very open minded and fun-loving, meaning she will likely agree to tag along in whatever adventure you’re dragging her into.

Vivian will actually stop hating couples/media with romance and fictional couples in it, so if you guys are dating, her bitterness towards normies would fade.

You will be up to speed when it comes to Gen-Z language and internet lingo in no time, because this girl is very much a nerd who grew up with memes.

With her, cringe culture is basically dead; in other words, she will absolutely join you, decked out in full frontal cosplay, and even go as far as to Naruto run with you.

the cons.

Vivian may be eccentric, but she isn’t a manic pixie dream girl, so you may end up disappointed if she doesn’t give you important life lessons or improve your life in any meaningful way. I mean, this girl is dumb, to the point where she doesn’t exactly have the best head on her shoulders.

She will still love 2D characters, to the point where she will continue hyperfixating over them and writing fanfiction of them. She will, however, cease to have the desire to date them in real life.

She has very bad table manners... meaning she might shamelessly belch around you.

Regardless of your gender, she will ask if you would want to take a leak together at some point.

With actual boundaries being set, Vivian can eventually mellow out over time, but if you don’t play your cards right, she can become obsessed with you. Honestly, due to the fact she has compulsive sexual behaviour, chances are high she will instigate very inappropriate actions around you.. Basically, though, if you give her an inch, she will take a mile, and by having sex with her, you’re potentially putting your dick in crazy.

Does prefer men and masc-aligned individuals, so while she is capable of being attracted to women/gender queer folks, Vivian might end up becoming miserable in a monogamous relationship with someone who isn’t a man. Like... if she is strictly forbidden to explore her sexuality with men/masc-aligned individuals, there’s a high chance she will feel trapped in that relationship, but she will never express it to you, because she doesn’t want to hurt your feelings.

She’s a slob, so she won’t often brush her hair and will probably be found with her pant pockets hanging out. Coupled with the fact she struggles when it comes to executive functioning, there might even be times where she forgets to brush her own teeth.

Despite being a true girl at heart, Vivian isn’t stereotypically feminine and will act very boyish, to the point where she’ll be the one to hold out doors and pull out chairs for you.

Vivian’s stubborn... and can get very mean-spirited, if you end up making her angry.

Because she’s an autistic woman who refuses to mask, she might prove to be a bit too much for the average neurotypical person. Honestly, her autism isn’t a cute quirk you can simply love away; in fact, it’s very much a permanent part of her, so there may be days where you’re frankly frustrated with her.

Her sense of humour can be considered off-putting at times.

She will risk her own life in order to protect you, meaning Vivian would basically shove you away from a moving car and let herself be hit instead.

The older she gets, the more she would become disillusioned by romance, so there may come a point where she would regret being in a relationship, especially with how much hard work it is and how much compromise it requires. Of course, this doesn’t mean she would necessarily stop loving her partner, but she might have lingering doubts and uncertainties over a future with them.

If you’re a man, her parents will likely bug you about having kids and will ask when you’re planning on give them grandchildren.

[alarajrogers]

I'm not trans or masc, but this makes absolute sense to me.

If you've spent your life aligned with women, then you are a man who understands women, is closely aligned with them, and does not see women as lesser or inferior, and probably participates gladly in female-coded activities (the trans guy I live with used to crochet before his meds made it impossible.) This is not the same kind of man as the one who makes a huge performance out of not understanding women, claims he sees women as equals but then doesn't act that way, and is absolutely allergic to female-coded activities because he doesn't want to look gay.

We say "men are the oppressors" and we leave out all the adjectives.

Trans men are men, but maybe, men as they should be. Men who consciously embrace masculinity, who love masculinity, but who are not afraid of or disgusted by women. Men who understand that women are people, in a way that society tries very very hard to make cis men fail to understand.

There are obviously some misogynistic trans men, but, I mean, there are misogynistic women so what did you expect? Trans men as a group have been subjected to misogyny, and no matter how well they pass, they're always going to know what it's like.

I see no evidence that trans men have any male privilege over anyone, as a group; individual trans men may be able to access male privilege, but trans men range from "is clocked as female all the time" through "is clocked as queer" and finally to "is clocked as male", and only the last group can ever get any male privilege, and only as long as people don't know he's trans.

(bikenesmith on Twitter)

Maybe yall non-transmasc people should have a thought or two about this.

[abearinthewoods]

Adding a disclaimer here that I might be misunderstanding your post so feel free to clarify if you choose to respond.

In regards to your tag on the post about straight men and lesbians - We should most definitely reframe men's attraction to women specifically because so many think of it as inherently dangerous or harmful to women and that's 100% wrong. But when you use the term "cis man" are you also including people who exclusively identify as men only? Because they can't experience Sapphic love. That is because Sapphic love is about both your identity and feelings. It's about being femme/woman-aligned/identifying with womanhood in your identity in some way and liking femme/woman-aligned people.

If you're someone who does not see themselves as femme/woman-aligned in any way, you're not Sapphic just because you like women. That's only half the term. Sapphic love has its own meaning that does exclude people who are exclusively and only straight men or are exclusively and only straight women, and that's okay. Sexualities will exclude people by their own function and design.

*I do not believe this applies to trans men/trans mascs that also identify as lesbian, trans femme, and anyone who fits under the nonbinary umbrella but still identifies with men in some way. This is directed specifically at people who fit the term cisgender man *exclusively* and *only* use that term to describe their gender.

I mean i think you got it in the first half of the second paragraph.

In regards to your tag on the post about straight men and lesbians - We should most definitely reframe men's attraction to women specifically because so many think of it as inherently dangerous or harmful to women and that's 100% wrong.

I was mainly referring to how we see/treat/characterize cis men's attraction to women. Women's attraction to women, (even unrequited sexual attraction) among those that aren't homophobic, is often given this aura of purity and wholesomeness. (that, as an aside, can often come from a misogynistic place akin to infantilization).

Contrast that with how popular media and pop culture characterize men's attraction or love to women, predatory unless proven mutual.

You make some good points, and i think i can see how growing up as and otherwise identifying with your partner's gender can mean that it can be easier to create a deeper bond with them.

I just think the world could use more unity which means focusing less on how we are all different. There are cishet guys who identity more with how the typical lesbian woman talks about loving and sexual attraction towards women then the typical cishet guy. or women who identify more with how gay guys tend to talk about love and attraction.

No matter what the avg/typical/stereotype say about us being different on avg, there is always a chance for unity if you don't pigeon hole individuals.

[fortheloveofkonig]

This is honestly my first time on tumblr but I needed to find the active COD MW2 scene so here I am.

I don't know if introductions are usually used on this space but I'm gonna add one.

My name is Ash

I am 19 years old as of May 2023 (Jan. Bday)

I go by He/Him pronouns

I am a transmasc individual

I am currently on the move to get diagnosed with ASD and ADHD. Yes, I really believe I have both after years of research and speaking to multiple medical professionals. I never had the time for a diagnosis

I am a MASSIVE simp for König, Ghost & Price.

I also identify as Achillean (used to as ace but....my new found obsessions with fictional men proved otherwise.)

For those that don't know, Achillean is basically saying that you have attraction to men and masc aligned people

Like the opposite of Sapphic

I used to write Team Crafted fanfics on Wattpad😔 when I was like 12

I have 8+ years roleplay experience, I am on a hiatus from that

I played MW2 (2009), Black Ops 2 & 3 multiplayer with my brother but never the campaigns

I've only played MW2 (2022) campaign

I am on the east coast of the US

I think that's it

I love men

I love COD men

[fluidnet]

I’m trans masc, and was ace/het up until I started T. That CHANGED me, man. I realized that 1) attraction and desire are different and 2) that desire ramped up my ability to NOTICE my attraction.

Now I’m bi, and fully embrace the phrase “achillean” as a “man-aligned person attracted to other man-aligned people but not exclusively” (think like sapphic). I love it, I love BEING masculine and I love being ATTRACTED to masculinity.

I love androgyny, I love butch women and femme men and femme women and butch men and all the people everywhere who have different genders and expressions because we’re all unique and individual people.

But you’re absolutely right, it can get hella lonely in queer spaces when “queer” means “cis and gay” or “trans and straight.” I want things to be messy. I want things to be dirty. I want things to be queer.

Something I've been trying to articulate to myself for a while here, but I wish there were more discussion about the particular experiences of trans men who are attracted to men. Especially the way that it relates to our experiences before coming out and during transition.

A lot of the conversations I see online and in academia focus on the experiences and overlap between trans men and butch lesbians, which is just not a narrative that resonates with me. There has been no point in my life at which I identified as a lesbian, or even as particularly attracted to women in general (something something sexuality is complicated). And it is only recently that I've really been able to let myself jive with being a butch man.

So, what did that experience look like for me?

It looked like trying desperately to perform the right kind of femininity so that straight guys would be attracted to me. Admittedly, it was a "not like other girls" sort of femininity, but I suspect a lot of trans guys and straight women will understand me when I say that this particular kind of femininity is still... very constricting. You gotta be "tough" of course, and have the right sorts of interests, and not care too much about your looks, but at the end of the day still be pretty, not too loud, and pretty willing to give ground for straight men to feel cool. You absolutely cannot be butch, because butch is for lesbians, and you want to be attractive to men.

And then I came out, and now I was a man, so I was free of all of that, right? Right?

Well, turns out there's a whole lot to unpack and unlearn there, and doing that takes a long time. For the first several years of my transition, I was still stuck in this mindset of needing to adhere to all the same constraints I had been under before. The guy I was dating at the time didn't help with this, and I almost said that's another story, but it isn't. The fact that I was willing to keep dating a guy who wanted me to stay pretty and feminine, who told me that body hair was gross, and who in a thousand other little ways made it very clear that I would only stay lovable if I stayed feminine... the fact that I was ok with that, it says a lot about where my mind was at.

I'm sure that a lot of lesbians can relate to some of this, and yet. Becoming who I am, genuinely relaxing into myself and unfolding in the way that I needed to, that process was undeniably and indelibly marked by my experiences as someone who has always been attracted to and wanted to attract men.